thinking if its time

after years of taking shots everyday

and years of consideration

i'm finally thinking of swapping to a pump

made an appointment with the doc to discuss about switching to a pump

hopefully it won't cost too much as there is no such thing as medical insurance or government health benefit where i come from

fingers cross as i could say goodbye to multiple shots a day to a shot every 3 days

god bless

its 53 mins into october!

a new month and tons to prepare before exams!

xoxo

love hugs and kisses

life is sweet-less?

i tend to avoid food that has a high sugar content mainly because:

1) i can't have them

2) had not had sweet stuff for so long that i get sick when i have some

3) hyperglycaemia makes me go super crazy

whenever someone offers me cakes or desserts, i would kindly decline

and when they ask why, i would tell them that i am not into desserts

then they would give me this weird impression

"huh, how can you not like desserts?"

i won't tell them i'm diabetic cause most of them would feel bad for offering me desserts in the first place, so i rather not mention anything

i used to love sweets, cakes, desserts and sugars before i had diabetes

no way in the world i would pass on desserts or cakes

but ever since i had diabetes, i had to avoid all these

slowly, i learnt to not enjoy them anymore

but life ain't bad without sugar, we learn to live without it

watching u through mine

hands shake like parkinson's

very first indication that it is taking a dip

up or down i'll never know

till i test my blood sugar levels

shake shake shake, it impairs everything

cognitive function is near to nil

simple task becomes difficult

makes me think bout people with parkinson's

what i experience is just a tiny glimpse of your life

salute

rants rant ranting

"listen to people's rants and not rant about them ranting"

one saves three

needles and blood

we revolve around everyday

we never complain about what we have to go through everyday

the pain, the skin piercings, the finger pricks

the constant hypos and hypers

its not that we are used to needles or blood

its just that we do not make a big fuss about it

we suck it up and go on with life

so why do the fear of needles should stop you from donating blood?

suck it up, donate, and save three lives

meh

have not done a pretty good job in depicting my life as a diabetic

i am definitely a bad diabetic; no doubt there

i do try my best to keep everything under control, but they are times where my brain fools me by telling me that i'm just a normal person with a normal life

hence missing on insulin doses and not checking my sugar levels as often as i should

i hate counting carbs, and i never do a good job

i always estimate and won't be able to tell how good was my estimation because i always forget to check my sugar levels either before or after my meals

i need a beeper or something

lately i have been pretty stressed out with uni and the huge pile of assignment

i miss playing futsal, but it is just hard to get a court here; therefore no stress relieving activities

one thing that really bothers me is taking an insulin shot in public...

it freaks people out

some people even show their disgust

i know that they do not understand, so no blaming them

but it do kinda hurts sometimes

rather have a hyperglycaemia instead

or maybe i should opt for an insulin pump?

it is discreet and their is no needle visible

but the cost is mind blowing

i should definitely start buying lottery tickets, hopefully strike the jackpot and have enough cash to get a pump

anyways, i am taking a stance to change

life gets shorter and shorter

fatigue

malaise

dry skin

reddening of cheeks

sensitive cheeks

hair loss

lack of concentration

brain malfunction

seriously need to go see a doctor soon

been too tired and busy to do so

not much of a uni fan now

loving the free mondays and wednesdays

but every week, week in week out, it is packed with assignments to finish

me feeling like crap everyday, makes me want to puke when i stare at assignments

all i want to do now is just grab a ice cold sugary drink and chillax

let the sugar rush bring me into another world

or maybe do something packed with adrenaline... but what?